The episode opens with Regina letting the others know she trusts Zelena where Hades is concerned. This goes over just about as well as you think it would. She snarks at Killian, he snarks back and Emma intervenes to remind … Continue reading
Holy cow, it’s here. It’s finally here! The endless hiatus is over, and we are packed and ready for the highway to hell!! We begin with Emma waking up in her VW Bug on a street in Portland, and we … Continue reading
Okay, I started this list at 21- five for each season and one for season five (so far). I trimmed out some things that made me cry but landed on the happier end of the scale, I brushed aside some moments that felt like a fist in the gut and would surely make a top 40 list, but I just couldn’t get it down that low. I ended up with this. Every one of these moments brought the leakage to my eyes. Your mileage may vary, of course. So, in chronological order (to date), here they are:
Who can forget her grief as she handed that baby over? Heartwrenching.
After all he’d been through with his parents, and he’s such a gentle soul.
To have them put this dastardly deed in his lap was just…crushing. Continue reading
This episode begins with a conversation at the magical Storybrooke wishing well, where Felix is congratulating Pan for sticking it to Regina. Pan is assembling the ingredients to cast the curse, and happily, one of those ingredients is Felix’s heart, since he’s the closest thing Pan can get to love. He rips the bugger’s heart out and tosses it along with the other ingredients into the well, starting the chain reaction that will bring on the curse.
Our heroes on the other side of town are wondering how they’re going to stop a second curse, and Rumple may have a way. The curse was built to be unstoppable, but the person who originally cast it – and that’s Regina, of course – can use it to reverse the damage. Of course, that’ll come with a price, and it’ll be a steep one.
But first, he recommends that they use a spell to switch Pan and Henry back to their respective bodies, but he needs a powerful tool to do that: the black fairy’s wand.
Tink helpfully provides back story that will no doubt be called upon in a later story arc: the black fairy was well-learned in dark magic and very powerful. Blue exiled her but before she did, she took the black fairy’s wand. It’s possible Blue has it hidden in the church or convent somewhere.
David, Henry, Tink and Neal head off to the church and everyone else goes to Gold’s shop to prepare Henry for the body switch.
We begin this episode with Belle leading Ariel to Eric (and their smoochy Disney-bird reunion), just as the Jolly Roger breaks through the sky, streaking to a perfect landing (of course) in Storybrooke harbor.
The cheering crowds welcome our heroes home, and the Lost Boys are shuffled off to God knows where because we never see their sorry, scraggly asses again.
Belle tearfully hugs Rumple as Neal brings Rumple his gold-handled walking stick. Rumple tells his son it’ll be a reminder of the man he is no more.
Wendy finds her brothers, who are also thrilled to see Neal before they all head back to London, also never to be seen again.
In the middle of all these happy reunions, Snow directs everyone’s attention to Regina, giving her the praise she deserves as someone who really came through for them.
Oh yes, she did…bitches.
This evening we begin with deliciously evil Enchanted Forest Regina, rolling along in her royal carriage as Grumpy tolls the town bell screaming “The curse! It’s here!”
Rumplestiltskin is in his cell and Regina arrives to gloat. Rumple asks her how it felt to rip out the heart of the thing she loves the most, and Regina doesn’t dwell upon it. “It was the price of the curse,” she says, “how it felt doesn’t matter.”
Rumple seems to think that it matters very much. Something’s now missing inside Regina. A price that steep leaves a hole in your heart, and someday, Regina will come to him to fill it. She wonders if he’s taunting her in an effort to get out of the last deal he made and escape the curse, but Rumple makes it clear: he’s exactly where he wants to be.
We begin back in the Enchanted Forest this evening, with a young boy who’s watching a con man rooking passers-by with a card game. Unfortunately, he’s caught by a savvy customer, who begins to put a hurt on him. The boy runs forward, screaming that this is father, and the customer takes all the money and leaves. The man reassures the child that he’ll figure something out to replace the money, then he calls the boy by name: Rumple.
Forward to Neverland now, and Pan takes Henry to Wendy, who’s looking markedly worse. “If you save magic, you’ll save us all,” he pleads with Henry as Wendy the fakey faker coughs over-dramatically in the background. “We don’t have much time,” he warns.
Back to the Enchanted Forest again, and Rumple’s father is knocking at the door of the local spinsters – and they are truly “spinsters” as the word originates, spinning wool into thread for a living. He asks them to care for Rumple while he goes in search of employment. Young Rumple is clearly afraid and doesn’t want to be parted from his father, but Dad reaffirms that once he gets a real job, they’ll be together. He presses the now-recognizable straw doll into Rumple’s hand, telling him that he now has a friend to watch over him and protect him. He urges Rumple to give the doll a name. “Names always make things better,” he says. “They make them real.”
And then without a backward glance, he leaves.
We begin this episode in a slight flashback, with Rumple saying goodbye to Belle at the dock before their departure to Neverland. He gives her a cloaking spell to shield the town and she realizes he never means to come back because he’s going to Save HenryTM.
They show the cheesy CGI of the ship heading into the portal, and Belle lets the town know that they’re not safe – there could be others that were associated with Greg and Tamara who could be on their way to Storybrooke right now.
And of course, there are. We see a car speeding toward the town line, while Belle, Blue, Archie and the dwarves head down to the mines, to open up a vein of fairy dust. Once they do and release the spell, the dust will carry it through town. We see a brightly lit dome come down over the town, knocking the rear bumper off the car, but not before it makes it through and across the town line.
The two men inside glance at each other, and keep on driving into town.
Over in Neverland, Rumple gives Ariel an enchanted shell, asking her to deliver it to Belle. He won’t say what the object is for fear of Pan listening in, but he’s sure Belle will know what to do once she receives the shell. Ariel takes off and we head over to Pan, who senses that someone has left Neverland.
“We need to get word to our friends on the ground in Storybrooke,” he tells Felix. “And I need to have a chat with our friend in the other cage.”
We begin our episode running through the Enchanted Forest with our beloved bandit Snow White, with the queen’s soldiers in hot pursuit. They corner her on a cliff, and she chooses to jump into the sea over letting them take her. It’s a loooong way down and not looking so good for Snow, who blacks out when she hit the water. She is saved by a mermaid – and not just any mermaid!
Ladies and Gentlemen, Ariel has arrived!
Forward to Neverland now, where we see Regina trying to give Emma a magic lesson, and it’s not going well. She harps on Emma to focus, urging her to use her anger and channel it. Emma balks, insisting there has to be a way to use magic without taking it dark, but Regina is nagging at her until Emma gets good and pissed – and that finally lights the fire with magic.
David and Snow are watching from afar, not sure how they feel about all this, when Hook pulls them aside with a murmured “We need to talk.” He’s just come from his conversation with Pan, and without the slightest hesitation, he tells them that Neal is alive and on the island.
Snow immediately wants to tell Emma but David and Hook discourage that. Until they confirm that Neal is indeed alive and they can rescue him, it’s better to keep Emma in the dark and not hurt her all over again. Snow isn’t happy with keeping that secret (but come on, when has Snow ever been good at keeping a secret?) and she notes that secrets tend to keep you from the people you love. David gently reminds her that secrets can also protect the people you love.
Oh, David, right in the feels.
And into this confab strolls Emma, wondering what all the murmuring and furtive looks are about. David and Hook lie their shapely asses off, but Snow just blurts the secret right out. Emma’s shocked into silence, shooting a furtive glance at Hook.
When I sat down to retro-review this episode, I will admit I had to watch it twice. For science, you understand. And I’m also going to tell you right off the bat that this episode gets 648 billion hooks out of five, because it’s That. Damn. Good.
We begin this evening running through the jungle with the Lost Boys, who are dragging Neal along for the ride.
Meanwhile in Pan’s camp, some little shit of a Lost Boy is taunting Henry and poking him with a stick. Henry picks up a stick to defend himself, and Pan tells him he can believe his stick into being a sword, since he has the heart of the truest believer. Henry does so, and then using the skills his badass Grandpa and Papa taught him, he cuts the other kid’s stick down to nothing, and manages to get a slice across the kids’ cheek for good measure.
Henry is mortified that he hurt the kid, apologizing profusely, but Pan is clearly pleased. “Henry, don’t you know the best thing about being a Lost Boy?” he asks. “You never apologize.”
The Lost Boys send up a cheer for Henry, who seems to enjoy the praise.
Once Upon A Snarky Recap 